electronic_cigarette
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Concerns about vaping (lungs) and depression when quitting http://bit.ly/2FsJEw8

TL;DRI have health anxiety and worry often about if/how 1+ years of vaping has impacted my lung health, as I have pretty irrational fears based on very mild “sensations” about cancer, wet lung, and popcorn lung. I want to quit, but when I try, even with nicotine gum, I sink into a depression pretty quickly even though I have a great mental health care professional support team and good meds. I know I could get through the first week if I just let myself sleep, exercise, and veg out, but my life is too busy for that and my 7-year-old needs me. Ideas? Insights?

——————————

I’ve seen some posts here about quitting so I thought it might be okay. (If this more of a pro-vaping sub, please feel free to remove.)

So, first things first, I’ve been vaping for over a year now. I have a Smok Stick V8 (baby beast, I think). My husband also vapes and has commented that my vape seems more “intense” to him.

That may be why he doesn’t seem to get the same lung irritation I do sometimes.

I have to vape a very specific juice, otherwise I will get irritation. Not even worth it to me to try other juices. It’s been a while since I changed and I don’t have the exact bottle on me right now, but I vape Vapor Vapes Premium E-Juice, 3mg, 50/50. This is the only thing that doesn’t seem to cause lung irritation for me.

All that being said, it’s not fool proof. As I type this (and this may just be anxiety) I have some irritation.

This is what I hate the most about vaping: my health anxiety.

For some background, I’m 32, married, with a 7 year old daughter.

I have mental heath issues that are pretty well managed (therapy for 4ish years now, good meds, good professional support and family support.)

But one of my biggest struggles is that I have pretty bad health anxiety. I’m sure it’s rooted in a fear of death, but my heath anxiety is pretty centered around cancer. Last checkup at the end of 2017, I had a clean bill of health (had blood work done and everything).

But any time I have any kind of vaping irritation, I’m like “I have cancer.” Or at best, I’m like, “I have wet lung/popcorn lung.”

Lately, my anxiety has me focused on “sensations” in my right lung, and general right upper side of my body, around my shoulder. Now, when I’m being rational, I understand it could very well be a little bit from vaping, but this winter has also had my allergies a bit funky (so I could just be a teeny bit mucusy and combining it with vaping very well could be mildly irritating my lungs) and also, I work from home and my desk setup is anything but ergonomic, so I have some muscle funkiness on my right side (especially in my shoulder) from just the way I sit and use my mouse.

Sometimes the right side of my throat will also feel “swollen.” And when I take a deep breath, I can feel a “sensation” (like a 1 out of 10 in pain) on the right side near my ribs/armpit. Super rare but I’m kind of having it today. Also feel it kind of on my pectoral muscle. Sometimes when I take a drag from my vape, I feel a sensation (again, 1 out of 10 pain) in my back where I think my lung is.

Anyway, I will get hyperfocused on the fear that I have cancer in my right lung. I’m feeling this way today. (I need a checkup from the doc anyway, so I’ll probably schedule that soon. I should add that cancer in my family is really rare. It’s on both sides, but only in my elderly grandparents who lived to be in their 80s and 90s and it wasn’t cancer that took their lives…I have one cousin, a 2nd cousin I believe, who passed from ovarian cancer in her 40s. I am telling you all this because anxiety.)

Now, I’ve had this “sensation” before, and sometimes I’ll even feel like I’m having some funny wheezing/roughness in that lung (again, I may just be hyperfocused on it because anxiety), BUT if I slow down and just use nicotine gum for awhile, at least 6-8 hours or a day, it’ll stop.

A few months ago, I managed to quit vaping for a week and by the end of the week my body, that right side included, was feeling much better. I also coughed up some clear mucus as if my lungs were trying to clear something out, but only a little bit, for maybe a day.

So, all of that, naturally, makes me want to quit. Just being tired of this exacerbating my health anxiety. And when I’m feeling anxious about cancer/popcorn lung/wet lung, I get hyperfocused on it and suck as a mom, just very distant and crabby. Same as a wife.

Okay, so as for quitting…

I am no stranger to quitting nicotine. I quit cigarettes (smoked 1.5 years) for vaping in 2016. Vaped about 6 months and then quit that using nicotine gum. My memory of that is that it was honestly really easy. I don’t remember being really stressed out or anything. If fact, I don’t remember actually quitting. I just remember looking back at some point and going, oh, wow, I’m off nicotine.

I picked it up again sort of on accident in October of last year when my husband started in order to quit his 10 year smoking habit. (He’s still quit btw! Yay!)

But this time, quitting has sucked.

I quit vaping for about a week some months ago. It was horrible. Now GRANTED, I was also having some weirdness with my meds. So I say a lot of the horribleness had to do with that. I remember towards the end of that week crying and saying out loud, “I feel like I’m going crazy.” I was absolutely worthless. I picked the vape back up, took several drags, and within moments I was feeling better.

Again, I tried to quit some weeks back. This time it only lasted about a day. This time, my meds were in order. But by the end of the day, even with nicotine gum, I noticed my key symptoms (anxiety and depression) were beginning to blanket me. After just 9ish hours without my vape.

Yesterday, my goal was just to limit myself.

Again, by the evening, my mood had just sunk. I felt like I couldn’t laugh or enjoy my time with my daughter. I was crabby. I was kicking myself for not being a better mom.

At this point, I know what to expect when I stop vaping. It seems like, even with the gum, my brain chemistry is going to dip.

The thing is, I can handle it—give me a week without my responsibilities in order to just veg and get through it and do things I enjoy, and I can do it.

But that’s not real life.

I am a writer and I have to be able to sit at my desk and concentrate to get my work done or there will be hell to pay.

I’m a wife and mom and have to be able to be in a good place to be able to meet their needs. I can’t just lay around and watch TV for a week. I can’t just send my daughter away for a week, and I wouldn’t want to.

I don’t know how to put this stupid thing down and not become absolutely worthless. Even with my meds, I know there’s going to be a big dip, but I just don’t have the time or room on my schedule to spend that week in “rehab” if you will.

Any advice? Any comfort for the health anxiety stuff? Ideas or tips or experiences for letting go of the vape when life is busy and stressful?

TL;DR – I have health anxiety and worry often about if/how 1+ years of vaping has impacted my lung health, as I have pretty irrational fears based on very mild “sensations” about cancer, wet lung, and popcorn lung. I want to quit, but when I try, even with nicotine gum, I sink into a depression pretty quickly even though I have a great mental health care professional support team and good meds. I know I could get through the first week if I just let myself sleep, exercise, and veg out, but my life is too busy for that and my 7-year-old needs me. Ideas? Insights?——————————I’ve seen some posts here about quitting so I thought it might be okay. (If this more of a pro-vaping sub, please feel free to remove.)So, first things first, I’ve been vaping for over a year now. I have a Smok Stick V8 (baby beast, I think). My husband also vapes and has commented that my vape seems more “intense” to him.That may be why he doesn’t seem to get the same lung irritation I do sometimes.I have to vape a very specific juice, otherwise I will get irritation. Not even worth it to me to try other juices. It’s been a while since I changed and I don’t have the exact bottle on me right now, but I vape Vapor Vapes Premium E-Juice, 3mg, 50/50. This is the only thing that doesn’t seem to cause lung irritation for me.All that being said, it’s not fool proof. As I type this (and this may just be anxiety) I have some irritation.This is what I hate the most about vaping: my health anxiety.For some background, I’m 32, married, with a 7 year old daughter.I have mental heath issues that are pretty well managed (therapy for 4ish years now, good meds, good professional support and family support.)But one of my biggest struggles is that I have pretty bad health anxiety. I’m sure it’s rooted in a fear of death, but my heath anxiety is pretty centered around cancer. Last checkup at the end of 2017, I had a clean bill of health (had blood work done and everything).But any time I have any kind of vaping irritation, I’m like “I have cancer.” Or at best, I’m like, “I have wet lung/popcorn lung.”Lately, my anxiety has me focused on “sensations” in my right lung, and general right upper side of my body, around my shoulder. Now, when I’m being rational, I understand it could very well be a little bit from vaping, but this winter has also had my allergies a bit funky (so I could just be a teeny bit mucusy and combining it with vaping very well could be mildly irritating my lungs) and also, I work from home and my desk setup is anything but ergonomic, so I have some muscle funkiness on my right side (especially in my shoulder) from just the way I sit and use my mouse.Sometimes the right side of my throat will also feel “swollen.” And when I take a deep breath, I can feel a “sensation” (like a 1 out of 10 in pain) on the right side near my ribs/armpit. Super rare but I’m kind of having it today. Also feel it kind of on my pectoral muscle. Sometimes when I take a drag from my vape, I feel a sensation (again, 1 out of 10 pain) in my back where I think my lung is.Anyway, I will get hyperfocused on the fear that I have cancer in my right lung. I’m feeling this way today. (I need a checkup from the doc anyway, so I’ll probably schedule that soon. I should add that cancer in my family is really rare. It’s on both sides, but only in my elderly grandparents who lived to be in their 80s and 90s and it wasn’t cancer that took their lives…I have one cousin, a 2nd cousin I believe, who passed from ovarian cancer in her 40s. I am telling you all this because anxiety.)Now, I’ve had this “sensation” before, and sometimes I’ll even feel like I’m having some funny wheezing/roughness in that lung (again, I may just be hyperfocused on it because anxiety), BUT if I slow down and just use nicotine gum for awhile, at least 6-8 hours or a day, it’ll stop.A few months ago, I managed to quit vaping for a week and by the end of the week my body, that right side included, was feeling much better. I also coughed up some clear mucus as if my lungs were trying to clear something out, but only a little bit, for maybe a day.So, all of that, naturally, makes me want to quit. Just being tired of this exacerbating my health anxiety. And when I’m feeling anxious about cancer/popcorn lung/wet lung, I get hyperfocused on it and suck as a mom, just very distant and crabby. Same as a wife.Okay, so as for quitting…I am no stranger to quitting nicotine. I quit cigarettes (smoked 1.5 years) for vaping in 2016. Vaped about 6 months and then quit that using nicotine gum. My memory of that is that it was honestly really easy. I don’t remember being really stressed out or anything. If fact, I don’t remember actually quitting. I just remember looking back at some point and going, oh, wow, I’m off nicotine.I picked it up again sort of on accident in October of last year when my husband started in order to quit his 10 year smoking habit. (He’s still quit btw! Yay!)But this time, quitting has sucked.I quit vaping for about a week some months ago. It was horrible. Now GRANTED, I was also having some weirdness with my meds. So I say a lot of the horribleness had to do with that. I remember towards the end of that week crying and saying out loud, “I feel like I’m going crazy.” I was absolutely worthless. I picked the vape back up, took several drags, and within moments I was feeling better.Again, I tried to quit some weeks back. This time it only lasted about a day. This time, my meds were in order. But by the end of the day, even with nicotine gum, I noticed my key symptoms (anxiety and depression) were beginning to blanket me. After just 9ish hours without my vape.Yesterday, my goal was just to limit myself.Again, by the evening, my mood had just sunk. I felt like I couldn’t laugh or enjoy my time with my daughter. I was crabby. I was kicking myself for not being a better mom.At this point, I know what to expect when I stop vaping. It seems like, even with the gum, my brain chemistry is going to dip.The thing is, I can handle it—give me a week without my responsibilities in order to just veg and get through it and do things I enjoy, and I can do it.But that’s not real life.I am a writer and I have to be able to sit at my desk and concentrate to get my work done or there will be hell to pay.I’m a wife and mom and have to be able to be in a good place to be able to meet their needs. I can’t just lay around and watch TV for a week. I can’t just send my daughter away for a week, and I wouldn’t want to.I don’t know how to put this stupid thing down and not become absolutely worthless. Even with my meds, I know there’s going to be a big dip, but I just don’t have the time or room on my schedule to spend that week in “rehab” if you will.Any advice? Any comfort for the health anxiety stuff? Ideas or tips or experiences for letting go of the vape when life is busy and stressful?

Submitted January 12, 2019 at 04:58PM by franticshouting
via reddit http://bit.ly/2CluLZh}

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